According to the Canadian Paediatric Society, children under the age of two should have zero screen time. Children two to five years of age should limit their daily screen time to no more than an hour. And children over the age of five should keep their screen time down to under two hours per day. We see the same guidelines from the Fraser Health Authority (FHA) and the World Health Organization (WHO), among other leading experts and organizations.

Which is why it’s perfectly valid for my seven-year-old to ask why is it that adults are allowed to have so much more screen time than kids.

Kids and Their Questions

Children ask their parents (and other grown-ups in their lives) all sorts of questions. For some of these questions, there is some sort of factual answer, even if you may not know it yourself. Why do clouds form in the sky? What is the smallest country in the world? How far is one kilometer? But, for other questions, the answer is more subjective than objective, partly a matter of opinion and perspective. Like why adults “like” to work so much.

Or why grown-ups get to have more screen time than children.

If grown-ups are allowed to have or do this thing or that, why can’t kids have the same? “Oh, you’re not big enough yet to drive a car,” you might say. “I get to stay up later,” you explain, “because adults don’t need as much sleep as children do.” You feel justified in these responses, as I do. But what about when it comes to screen time among adults?

A Necessary Part of Daily Life

It’s undeniable that the world we live in today is different from previous generations. Many of you, like me, grew up right alongside the internet. We went from chatrooms and bulletin boards to live streaming and the metaverse. And let’s not forget about all the “connected devices” on our wrists, in our cars, and on our kitchen tables. Screens are everywhere, and we practically carry the entirety of human knowledge in our pockets.

For many of us, staring at a computer screen all day is a necessary part of the job description. How can I write, edit and publish content on the internet otherwise, right? Yes, all this screen time is a requirement to accomplish our daily responsibilities. From managing to-do lists to coordinating with colleagues, navigating to the shop to shopping for household supplies, we need our devices, our screens, and our connection to the internet. Right?

But, there is a certain hypocrisy to parenthood when it comes to screen time not related to things we have to do. Is it really necessary to thumb through TikTok and YouTube videos for hours on end, while binging through another Netflix series and doom-scrolling through Twitter?

But an Unhealthy Addiction and Habit?

To be a “good parent,” many of us strive to limit the screen time that our kids get to have each day. We falter and let things slide, of course, even when we know that relying on a “digital babysitter” probably isn’t in their best interest. And yet, we don’t apply the same kind of lofty rigor to our own screen time consumption.

No fewer than three of my goals from last year revolve around this idea of reducing my overall screen time. I resolved to keep my daily (mobile) screen time to under three hours, to skip screens during lunch, and to avoid work after dinner. The other goals relate tangentially, like reading more books (rather than staring at my phone), taking more steps (rather than staring at my phone), and taking the time to be still (and not stare at my phone). I achieved varying levels of success with these goals.

At this point, most of us recognize that we have an unhealthy addiction to screens (in general) and social media (in particular). And most parents also recognize that our children are human sponges, much more likely to see what we’re doing rather than hear what we want them to do. How many times have we fallen into the narrative of “do as I say, not as I do”? We can be better than that, can’t we?

Making Better Choices Together

Maybe, one of the steps we can take to address this issue of screen time is to apply these goals not to the individual, but to the family.

By this I mean that we can try to build a framework where we’re reducing our (less necessary) screen time as a family, partaking in more screen-free family activities, like reading books and exploring the woods. The challenge is we need to make it attractive, make it easy and make it satisfying. And I’ll be the first to admit that it’s tough to beat the allure of Instagram and Disney+. Screen time, in and of itself, isn’t necessarily a bad thing. We just need to be more conscious and intentional about the decisions we make around it.

How would you answer this question if a young child asked you? Why do grown-ups get to have so much more screen time?