Buddhism, the most popular of Eastern religions, is a case in point. Buddhism emphasizes the withdrawal of attachment from things of this world. It seeks the extirpation of desire. Desire is what leads to suffering, both of oneself and of others.

We all want to be happy. That feels obvious and intuitive enough. Depending on who you ask, you might say that happiness is defined by the absence of suffering. Or at least a reduction in it. The less suffering you have to endure, the happier you’ll be. Presumably. The million dollar question, then, is how do we go about reducing the suffering in our lives? According to moral philosopher Todd May, it starts with recognizing the role that desire plays in our lives.

This Is the Bad Place?

Dr. Todd May served as one of two philosophy consultants for the TV show The Good Place. As you might recall, the NBC series expertly blended bathroom humor with deeply profound discussions on moral philosophy and what it means to “be a good person.” Showrunner Michael Schur wanted to ensure the philosophy discussed and explored on the show was legit. So, Clemson University professor Todd May and UCLA philosophy professor Pamela Hieronymi signed on as consultants.

In his book Death (The Art of Living), Todd May approaches the meaning of life by addressing the inevitability of death. Part of that has to do with the suffering intrinsic to the human condition. We all suffer, to some degree or another. And, perhaps to some degree or another, our human sense of desire drives and feeds into our suffering. We want. And when we don’t get, we suffer.

Human beings desire things: material success, recognition, comfort, love and so on. The problem is that no amount of any of these things will slake desire. Desire just transfers its want to something else or something more. By allowing ourselves to be subject to our desire, we are eternally unsatisfied. We can never be at peace as long as we desire. We will always suffer.

Everyone Hates Moral Philosophy Professors?

This is not a novel concept. Archbishop Desmond Tutu and His Holiness the Dalai Lama explore a similar notion in The Book of Joy. When we define our lives through envy, deficit, and desire, we suffer. Ambition isn’t an inherently bad thing, but we must also be grateful, truly, for what we do have in our lives. We must be satisfied with what we have. Even Casey Neistat expressed a similar sentiment when he presented the happiness equation: happiness equals reality minus expectation.

If you have high expectations, and your reality fails to live up to those expectations, you’re unhappy. Todd May is saying the exact same thing in the context of desire and suffering. If you desire a lot, and you only get a little, you suffer. You want more. What you get just doesn’t feel like it’s enough.

What’s more, as Dr. Todd May points out, nothing will ever really feel like enough. This is true of material possessions, just as it’s true of accolades, praise, or a sense of self-importance. If you desire to “be rich,” no amount of money will feel like enough. You’ll keep moving the goal post, redefining what it means to “be rich” as you go. In this way, desire resembles anxiety.

Does Todd May Make You Feel Anxious?

As Romanian philosopher Emil Cioran once asserted, anxiety “tries to find a justification for itself, and in order to do so seizes upon anything.” Even if you have no “reason” to be anxious, your anxiety will provoke and engender itself. It will seek out a reason for its existence. Desire is much the same. When you feel like you want something, but you don’t know what that is, you’ll start looking for things you want.

You didn’t actually want a Tesla until you saw your neighbor cruise down the street in theirs. You didn’t want the newest iPhone until you watched a YouTube video about it. To desire is to suffer. Before we seek out external sources of happiness (and suffer when we don’t get enough of them), we need to look within ourselves and answer honestly. Do we really want that thing? Do we really think it’ll make us happy?

Death (The Art of Living) by Todd May is available now in paperback, hardcover and Kindle formats. The Good Place: The Complete Series is also available now in Blu-ray and DVD. For even more, watch the Mother Forkin’ Morals series with Dr. Todd May on YouTube. Here’s the first video on the topic of existentialism.

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