The Animal Crossing Guide to Parenting

So, it’s no secret how much I love Animal Crossing New Horizons on the Nintendo Switch. If you’ve been following me on social media these past few weeks — particularly in my Instagram Stories — you’ve surely seen me post about this game. If you’ve never played an Animal Crossing game, you might not understand its appeal. After all, it’s really just an indentured servitude simulator… which is almost why it’s quite the powerful allegory for what it’s like to raise a kid. So, here we are with my Animal Crossing guide to parenting.

To be fair, this isn’t the first time I’ve compared a video game to mom and dad life. In fact, it’s not even the first time I’ve compared an Animal Crossing game to parenting. It feels so long ago now — the days are long, but the years are short? — but I wrote about how parenting compares to Animal Crossing Pocket Camp a little over two years ago.

Now that we have an even bigger and fuller game on the Nintendo Switch, we’ve got all sorts of new insights and experiences to share that relate to parenthood too. Tell me if any of these sound familiar.

Short and Long-Term Goals

In New Horizons, you’ve always got multiple things on the go. For the first part of the game, some of your longer term goals involve attracting more residents to your deserted island. And you’re trying to entice K.K. Slider to come put on a concert. And, as is par for the course with Animal Crossing games, you’ve got perpetual crippling debt to pay to Tom Nook. In the short term, there are quick tasks for bonus Nook Miles, plus your regular errands and tree-shaking duties.

Parenting works in much the same way. On the one hand, you’re just trying to make it through another day. You may have a short-term goal of taming a toddler tantrum. Or convincing a fussy eater to finish their supper. Longer term, you might be thinking about goals related to school. Or putting money aside for a college fund, like investing in an RESP. Those financial concerns parallel the drive to earn Bells in Animal Crossing to pay for a new bridge or house upgrade.

Juggling Priorities

Tying right into the previous point, you’ve always got a number of goals in Animal Crossing New Horizons. And these objectives can all feel like they’re pretty important, so you’ve got to decide how you’re going to prioritize your time and efforts. Should you be raking up those Bells and putting it toward getting a bigger house? Or is it more important to pay off those ramps and bridges you’ve been meaning to build? Is interior decorating your jam? Or are you more about finding fossils for Blathers and the museum?

Surprise! Parenting is just like Animal Crossing! Is it better to set that money aside for an RESP or should you enroll your child in a variety of programs and activities? Are you over-structuring or under-structuring their day? Is it more important that Cassie finish her dinner? Or should she be spending more time on her math homework? Should you be working more so you can provide your child with greater opportunities? Or working less so you spend more quality time together?

Spending Time, Reaping Rewards

I get it. Both in Animal Crossing New Horizons and in parenting, some days can feel like a slog. Like you’re just grinding it out with those repetitive daily duties, running on a treadmill and simply going through the motions.

One person pointed out that Animal Crossing can feel like all you’re doing all day is waiting for fish to bite on your lure. Catching those fish worth 200 Bells each to put toward a high six-figure debt. But then, you get these little rewards… like buying a giant red Godzilla statue to put on your tropical island.

Parenthood is excruciatingly difficult and trying at the best of times. Because you’re with your kids every day, it can be hard to see those incremental improvements and changes. But, if you pay attention, there are these tremendous moments that make it all worth it. I’ve been amazed at how much Addie’s reading ability has progressed since starting kindergarten. There’s room for improvement — of course there is — but it’s remarkable how far she’s come.

It Gets Easier?

You’ve surely heard this cliche saying as it applies to parenting. When you’re grasping at strings after another sleepless night with the newborn, veteran parents will tell you it gets easier. When you’re at odds with an impudent ankle-biter, parents of older children tell you it gets easier. While those first few months will always be rough, parenting doesn’t really gets easier. The challenges just get… different. The inconsolable child can grow up to be an angsty teenager who “hates you forever.” Or so I’ve been told.

In Animal Crossing, many of your early tasks can feel like they’re taking forever to complete. When will I ever get across the river? When will K.K. Slider finally come and visit my island? But, once you cross those milestones, you face brand new ones. And you unlock new abilities, like a variety of “reactions” and crafting increasingly complex items. These new tasks aren’t any easier; they’re just different.

It Takes a Village

In previous versions of Animal Crossing, you really only had “control” over your own house. You can move the furniture around, toss on some new wallpaper, choose the song playing on your little radio, and so on. In New Horizons, your abilities (and responsibilities) span the entire deserted island. You can place decor items practically anywhere, start new construction projects, and eventually even change the landscape altogether with terraforming.

Really, what better analogy could we have for parenting than this newly expanded vision of what an Animal Crossing game can be? On many levels, parenthood requires us to be selfless (at least some of the time). You shift your mindset from “what’s in it for me?” to “do it for them.” It’s not just you (your “house”); it’s about the whole family (your “island”).

And the whole adventure can be awfully cute if you take the time to notice. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got some rocks to hit with my shovel.

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