I think it’s the reason why I feel so driven to try to scream out at people, “This is me. Isn’t it weird? What do you think?” And see if they think it’s weird, too.

I mean, we’re all kind of weird in our own weird little ways, right? Though, I suppose Kate McKinnon of Saturday Night Live fame is her own special kind of weird. And, over the years, she’s really come to own her weirdness.

The above line comes from McKinnon’s appearance on Breakfast, Lunch & Dinner with chef David Chang. You may recognize Chang from Ugly Delicious or his growing family of restaurants. (They’re opening a Momofuku in Vancouver next year!) The two visit Cambodia in the episode, eating rice doughnuts and foregoing the fried crickets.

The trend of celebrity chef fandom aside, I’ve always seen myself as a little weird, a little unconventional. I’ve always been a bit of a square peg in a world of round holes. Maybe that’s why I still, to this day, feel like I need to justify my existence to the people around me. It’s weird that I pursued freelance writing almost straight out of university, isn’t it? It’s not exactly mainstream to be a full-time work-at-home dad, is it?

This is me. Isn’t it weird?

The struggle of whether to try to completely assimilate or to be alienated and really run with what makes you different. That tension is the genesis of any sort of meaningful creation.

While I’m not so certain that great art must come from a place of pain and struggle, there is something to be said about a bit of “healthy” tension in your life. Much like Kate McKinnon, I very much feel this struggle of power between standing out and fitting in. If you’re just like everyone else, you can only hope for mediocrity. If you’re remarkably different from everyone else, you’re vulnerable to ridicule and catastrophic failure.

I feel like we’ve all had that kind of experience in high school. We desperately want to “fit in” and find a place of belonging. And while we convince ourselves later on that the high school years didn’t really matter, adult life is equally filled with cliques and ostracization. Do you do things because they’re what are expected of you? As a guy, I’m supposed to like craft beer and professional sports, right? But, do I like those things because society says I should? Or because I actually do like them?

The truth is, I don’t feel like I belong anywhere. And you know what? Maybe that’s okay. After all, I’d say it’s worked out just fine for Kate McKinnon. Stay weird, my friends.