The self-proclaimed root of all evil is at it again. John Chow has just “published” an e-book that will help you make money online. Whereas “get rich quick” e-books oftentimes go for sale on the web for $100 or more, John is selling it to you, the aspiring dot com mogul, for the amazing price of zero dollars.

Inside, you’ll find useful tips for finding the most lucrative ad networks, how to best market your up and coming blog, and even some inside stories on how John survived the first dot com bust. The content is insightful, interesting, and actually useful. Best of all, it’s absolutely free. Here’s a list of the chapters in this must-read 59 page handbook.

1. Introduction
2. My Recommended Money Makers
3. Beginner’s Blogging Tips
4. Must Have Wordpress Stuff
5. Pumping Out the Content
6. Monetize Your Blog
7. Google Optimization
8. Promotion Ideas
9. My Story

Download his money-making e-book here.

If you go to your local cineplex today, you’ll find that there are three movies that are the third installments in their respective series. I haven’t had a chance to watch Spider-Man 3 yet and I’m still avoiding the crowds for Pirates of Caribbean: At World’s End, but this past Friday evening, I took a short trip to the movie theatre and soaked in the experience known as Shrek The Third. In following with my promise to review every movie I watch in 2007, here are my thoughts on the animated flick featuring a talking donkey, a cat with a sword, and an ogre ordained to be king.

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you surely already know about this green monstrosity voiced by Mike Myers. The first Shrek movie was wildly original and gut-wretchingly funny. This was because although it had the appearance of a children’s movie, there were plenty of “inside jokes”, so to speak, that only the older audience would understand. As a result, Shrek was a movie that could be enjoyed by all ages… it was funny, great to look at, and surprisingly intelligent. The first two might still apply to this third edition of the Shrek franchise, but I’m very, very hesitant to give it that third characteristic.

Don’t get me wrong, Shrek The Third is still reasonably funny and it’s got its moments, but it’s far from being as smart as it once was. The voice acting was fine — although I didn’t particularly enjoy Justin Timberlake as “Arty” — but the script was severely lacking. The story wasn’t compelling at all and it just didn’t hold my interest the way that the first two movies did.

It’s funny, really, because the two best characters were also the ones that got, by far, the least amount of screen time. Gingerbread Man and Pinocchio were hilarious. The one scene that really sticks out in my mind was when Pinocchio is getting interrogated about Shrek’s whereabouts and in an effort to avoid lying (and thus allowing his nose to grow), he goes on like a politician with non-committal statements. I’m paraphrasing, but it went something like “It cannot be said with absolute certainty that it may be true or not whether Shrek is here or there and this knowledge, notwithstanding….”

It was also fun when the ladies above set out to escape from their prison. I won’t ruin it for you, but their initial strategy wasn’t exactly what you would expect.

In the end, Shrek the Third was mildly amusing, but it is by far the worst of the trilogy. If you’ve already watched the first two Shrek movies, you might as well watch this one and complete the set, but don’t go in with high hopes of terrific comedy. Instead, go in expecting some mild chuckles and some smirk-inducing sight gags. If you’ve got the time, I recommend you check Meet the Robinsons. Same style of animation, but more intelligent and (arguably) funnier.

2.5 stars out of 5

I’ve only recently installed the StumbleUpon toolbar in Firefox. I’ve known about it for a long time, but because I’ve been so busy with my freelance writing and all, I haven’t given myself too much of a chance to just enjoy myself and my time on the web. Well, I’ve made it a point to find a better life-work balance, and a big part of that is just finding random junk on the internet that makes me smile, laugh, or think just a little. Here are a few sites that I Stumbled Upon in the past week.

1. Someone sent me a link to Angry Alien Productions a long while back and I took in some of the videos and had a good chuckle. In case you’re not familiar, they re-create popular movies so that they are only 30 seconds long and they are acted by bunnies. I watched their renditions of The Exorcist, Pulp Fiction, and The Shining before, but since Stumbling Upon it again, I’ve also watched a few new additions to the collection, like Borat and Spiderman. Good stuff.

2. Although I use PhotoShop to edit some images for Mobile Magazine, I’m far from being an expert in what the powerful software package has to offer. The Photoshop tutorials on Photoshopcontest.com look like they’d be some great reading for anyone looking for some extra expression. Peel a light bulb, anyone?

3. Here’s some perfect poster placement at a Galaxy movie theatre. Nope, there’s no subliminal message at all!

4. I like movies. I also like movie mistakes. I’m talking about seeing Nike shoes in Ancient Rome, a sudden change in lighting in the middle of the day, or windows that miraculously repair themselves. They’ve got a list of some of the best mishaps in movie-making.

5. Do you like puzzles? Then you might enjoy Quest for the Rest, a website designed to promote an album by some musicians named the The Polyphonic Spree (the “upcoming” disc was released in 2004). You have three characters that have to make their Lemming-like way across a landscape and you manipulate this environment by clicking on various portions of it. Click on a frog and he’ll lash out at a dragonfly, for example. Piece together the right sequence of moves and your Beatles-like avatars will walk across and find the exit.

Well, you’re not going to find it here. Instead, here’s a couple of funny “Demotivators - the Motivational Posters for the Rest of Us!”

And here’s a bonus one that John might enjoy:

After visiting the San Diego Zoo, the next stop of our cruise vacation was Catalina Island. Located about 22 miles off the shores of San Pedro in California, Santa Catalina Island (its full name) is a fairly isolated community that is still officially a part of LA County. There is but a single town on the entire island and that was as far as I visited. Avalon consists of only about three or four blocks of tourist trap-type stores, lining the beach. Beyond these stores, you’ll find some small and old homes that actually fetch quite the pretty penny — the local real estate office had a few places listed in the seven-figure range. I’d imagine the mansions on the hills would cost even more.

It was good to see a smaller community like Avalon, given that I spend too much time in the big city anyways. It was quiet, laid back, and the waters were crystal clear. In an effort to maintain the environmental integrity of Catalina, the government has severely restricted the use of motor vehicles. You have to get a special license to drive a regular car, so most of the residents get around town in golf carts. It’s like one big gated community… gated with water.

Getting back to the shopping area, the stores are mostly filled with tourist-y things like t-shirts, fridge magnets, and other collectibles. It was fun checking out the unique arts and crafts, though, like figurines carved out of wood, fashioned from empty coconuts, or pieced together from seashells. I should have bought one, but I thought that it would be too fragile to handle the rough ride home. Anyways, here’s a picture of the beachfront boardwalk.

I’d say that Catalina Island was easily the most relaxing port of call. One thing that was particularly interesting was that the port itself was nowhere near large enough to handle our Royal Caribbean cruise ship, so we had to be shuttled back and forth via “tenders”, or smaller boats that carried people and supplies between the cruise ship and dry land.

Let’s have a look to see how many people have entered by contest to win a free t-shirt.

Entries so far:
none

That’s right, nobody has entered. What does this mean? Well, it looks like the first person to enter has a very good chance of winning. You know, like 100%. I’d say the odds are pretty good. The irony is that the contest page has been dugg by three people.

What are you waiting for? CLICK HERE FOR A FREE T-SHIRT!